Several months ago in December, Farm Stud decided that he wanted to buy some steers for his property (he sells them after 18 months or so), so he announced that we going to the sale yards where suppliers of cattle place them in enclosures.
I was quite excited to be going to see how they went about this business of sellers selling their cattle to ready buyers - auction style! Just in case there is cow poo that we'll have to walk past & over, I decided to wear jeans and my "farm" boots.
Anyway, we get there and all the enclosures are arranged side-by-side in a row. Each enclosure has a gate (of course!) with the cattle within. Alongside each row of cattle enclosures (& cattle) is a slightly raised platform that runs the length of each row of enclosures. This raised platform is for the buyers to examine the cattle in each enclosure so that they can decide which batch of cattle they would like to bid for when the auctioneer comes around.
The auction is carried out systematically with the auctioneer and his "sidekicks" moving along yet another platform which is higher than the audience's platform, more like overhead but across from the audience's platform.
Before the auction begins, Farm Stud & I move through gates onto the different platforms to examine the cattle of interest. So I decide to stand at one spot looking over the railing at the steers below me when one of the steers in the enclosure decide that he wants to hump another mate of his. That enclosure was really crowded with about 15 of the steers so space was a scarcity when the randy one decided to rise to the occasion. The "humpee", however, was in no way, happy to oblige so decided to move forward away from the rising hooves of the other one. The inevitable, you guessed it, happened. While trying to get away in a small space, the runaway steer kicked up some of the green soft stuff that was on the ground in their enclosure flew and some got on the arm of the lady standing next to me while some of it flew and SPLAT!On my jeans! COW POO!
I tried to hide the green stuff on my jeans because I didn't have tissue or paper to get it off my jeans. I casually walked over to Farm Stud:
Tractor-Chick: Guess what?
Farm-Stud: What?
Tractor-Chick: (sheepishly & discreetly pointed) Look!
Farm-Stud: Hahahahaha! They got you!!! Hahahahaha!
Tractor-Chick: Did you have to laugh so loudly? (making a face) I'm beginning to feel the wet going through my jeans onto my thigh!
Farm-Stud: Hahahaha!
Tractor-Chick: I'm going to the car for some tissue!
Farm-Stud: Hahahaha! Alright Babe, shit happens at a cattle-yard sale!
Welcome to Australia!
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